Murphy Dome Diaries

A journalist observes life in the far north.

The day I cut off all of my hair

Almost three weeks ago, I plopped into a chair at the beauty salon, looked my hairdresser, Alicia, in the eye and told her to lop off my bra-strap-length mane.

“I want a pixie.” I half-hoped that she would talk me out of it.

“Sure, we can do that.”

I combed over a pile of hair magazines in my lap while Alicia grabbed locks of my hair, brushed them with a goo and wrapped foil around my roots. I’m basically a bottle blonde.

I settled on a picture of a girl with hair sort of like Michelle Williams, the actress. The style is short and combed to one side with hair that comes down at the ear, slicing it in half.

Alicia turned my back to the mirror and got to work.

Slowly, my head felt lighter and lighter. I searched the other hairdressers’ faces for a glint of reaction to my new do but they held a steady gaze to my head. It gave me an uneasy feeling.

I resolved to remained calm and not to peek until Alicia was through. She slowly turned my chair around.

“Oh, my gosh.”

My initial feeling was disappointment. My face looked round and boyish. I swallowed and ran my fingers through the shorn locks. My neck was cold but my head felt light. I liked that.

I paid, and as I left another hairdresser said that I looked younger. I liked that.

I checked myself out a couple of times in the rear view mirror as I drove to pick up my kids. When I got home, I posted a picture on Facebook. Alec, my guy, said I looked sexy.

Overall, some friends have paid compliments. Other have acknowledge the deed but offered no disappointment or approval. I combed my hair into a mohawk a few times. I even wore a mohawk to the preschool on a day that I was a parent aide. And I wore a mohawk to the ballet.

I try to interpret stranger’s reactions to me in relation to my hair. I suppose it’s all speculation but I feel like younger people are nicer to me.

Sometimes, I feel smug because I think that I have achieved the goal of not looking like a middle aged mom. But than other times I see a grandma with my haircut, and I feel like I might panic. After all, I am in my 40s now. I have siblings and friends who are grandparents.

I like wearing fleece pullovers that zip up my neck. And I like wearing earrings again. A couple of times I wore some earrings that my mom wore all of the time about 20 years ago. They are long and almost touch my shoulder with orange flowers set on a white background. For some reason, they make me feel elegant.

I style my hair with pomade now every morning. Sometimes, I clip small silk flowers on my hair. I’ll probably grow it out again but for now I’ll try to enjoy this nice, easy hair-do.


2 comments on “The day I cut off all of my hair

  1. Auntie Lia
    May 2, 2012

    Amanda you look gorgeous ~ tres chic ~ I love the new look!

  2. Bottle Washing Fairy
    May 16, 2012

    How did I miss this post!?! Oh, I was in Ashland. The world fades when I’m there. Love the picture. And, you are gorgeous, as always.

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This entry was posted on May 1, 2012 by .
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